So, Billy Hill has a buddy that is recently divorced. Billy Hill and his buddy were talking the
other day over a snort of Woodford Reserve Double Oaked (highly recommended) and his buddy laid out this Rubik’s cube of a dilemma for Billy to
pontificate. It has been haunting Billy
every since and so, he is just putting it out there, sort of like giving a cold
to someone else, so that he can get rid of it.
That is how it works right? You
sneeze and give the cold to someone else then you walk away a free man? So, you put your dilemma out there for others
to read and that pretty much takes it off your back? Right? We shall see.
It is clear that the wounds from a bad marriage, an ugly
divorce, a crappy dad, or any of a variety of other emotionally charged
situations (death of a loved one, sexual abuse, physical and/or emotional abandonment, an abortion, etc.) are real and
need healing. The first step is to admit you are hurt and wounded and then try to identify what
those wounds are. This in and of itself
can be a tough task. It takes time,
reflection, honesty with yourself, listening to others, and sometimes some
wisdom from Above. But the hardest part is just admitting it. As a grade A, "number 1 in his class", bad ass, Billy gets that, even though he has never been hurt himself or wounded, he can see how those that actually have a soul could be wounded. Billy, incidentally, does not have a soul, nor a heart for that matter. Who needs a heart when the only thing flowing through his slightly clean copper veins is bourbon, and yes its neat.
But accepting the truth and identifying the wounds is not enough, you then have the
whole issue of tending to those wounds. Some
wounds are worse than others and may require immediate triage. But in general, there are two things that can
be done. (1) heal the wounds by medicating them or (2) simply get rid of the pain by anesthetizing the wounds (apply something
that numbs the pain) – obviously, you could do both as well.
If you do not know what the wounds are, obviously all efforts will
most likely be fruitless. Bengay does nothing for a broken leg.
You cannot heal a sucking chest wound by taking a shot of morphine. But once you know what the wounds are, you
now have an even more arduous task of finding out what medicates the wound
versus what anesthetizes the wound. The
first makes it better, the latter just makes the pain go away but does not heal
the wound.
If you only anesthetize the pain of a wound, you run the
risk of never healing or even making the wound worse. For instance, if you anesthetize a broken
bone so you can walk, you most likely will cause more damage without even
knowing it, that is until the bone comes poking out of your skin (sorry Billy
just threw up in his mount a little bit).
So, for physical injuries, this is all easy peasy, but for emotional,
spiritual and mental wounds, how in the world do you know what medicates and
what numbs?
Suppose the wound is rejection and abandonment, closing yourself
off from the world can prevent further hurt, but is it going to bring healing? Likewise, jumping into another romantic
relationship may anesthetize the hurt and pain but most likely does not
medicate it. In addition, if the other person in the romantic relationship
figures out that they are simply an aspirin or a shot of nitrous oxide, you
could find yourself right back in the battle field getting more of the same
wounds that you just openly shared with your hit of nitrous oxide that gets
pissed off and starts poking you in the same wounds. In addition, you may find that you just
inflicted some wounds on the innocent party as well. Well, crap!
That is not cool at all.
Anesthesia is easy to find.
Bourbon, tobacco, pornography, a prostitute, sleeping which is sort of
like a self induced coma, sleeping around, work, entertainment, eating, you get
the point – it is a Rahab. But, what medicates,
what is the Rehab?
What about pouring into friends, mission work or the
homeless shelter, all of these could simply be to anesthetize as well but, they
have a nice gleam of righteousness so it seems like you are doing the right
thing. But, it may just operate to numb not heal.
So should you close off from the world and just pour into
the Word? Is this all we have? Seeking
after an intangible, inaudible, invisible God in an effort to bring healing for
our hurting, our longing to be touched and held, our hunger to be accepted and
desired, our craving to be loved and understood and understood AND loved? Can this intangible God give a hug? Can he hold you and say “it is going to be
okay”? After all, the promise in Revelations of wiping your tears
away isn’t realized until your dead right?
How do we find the right medication and avoid simply
anesthetizing the wound? Is it okay to
have some anesthesia to bring comfort while we still seek for and apply medication?
Identify the wound then identify the proper medication. "Right Billy, and just how in the hell do you
do that" says a questioning voice at a nearby keyboard? Well, there is always the puppy swarm. Surely that unconditional love would
help. Why can’t God give us a good old
supernatural puppy swarm? You may not
realize this because you are probably not as smart as Billy but hey, doctors
are just human body enginerds. They only
have a limited repertwar (or repertoire for your French speaking folk) of
medications, a playbook and experience to tell them what works based on the perceived
symptoms. They apply it and if it does
not work, they try something different.
Maybe that is what Billy’s friend needs to do, become his own emotional
enginerd. Press in to things that lift
the darkness and don’t bite. If it
bites, try something else. Then after a
bit, step away for a time and see if there was healing (medication). But if the
same level of pain comes back, then perhaps it was just numbing (anesthesia). Press back into the former and flee from the
latter, I mean like don't pack your bags or a sandwich flee, just F L E E. Cling to the Rehab and run away
from Rahab. But don’t forget, even Rahab
had a bit of Rehab herself so don’t go killing Rahab, it isn’t about her, or him or it, or
the bourbon. It is not the vise that
makes it a vise, it is the viser or the viseree (Billy sometimes is his own
lexographer). Billy Hill scratches his
head and walks away thinking to himself “whew, I am exhausted but now its your
problem, Billy is going to go grab a bourbon” because Billy, well he ain’t got
no wounds, he’s a bad ass.
Billy Hill here, I like it neat
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